Mommy's Letter to William Ethan Morgan

My dear sweet baby Will,

I loved you before you were even conceived.  I will never forget the moment I knew you were growing in my belly.  I was singing and dancing and could not wait to share the news.  I thanked God for you every day and focused on loving every moment that we had to share.  My heart grew over the past 10 months to allow me to experience a love that I never knew possible.  Each day my love for God grew because of the miracle he allowed us to share.  I had more love for your father who cared for the two of us with more dedication and concern than I had ever seen.  I had more love for you who brought more joy into my life than I ever knew possible.  Yes the past 10 months have been the best 10 months of my life.

I know that you are with God today.  I may not understand his plan but I do know that if he needed someone full of love he choose the right boy to help him.  Your daddy and I love you so dearly but that is just the beginning.  You have grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, and even perfect strangers who have been moved by your journey.  You, my sweet precious William, have in your short little life been loved more than many who have very long lives.  You have inspired so many of us to be better people and to make the most of the lives and our physical health that we sometimes take for granted.   We are so very proud of you.

I am your mommy and you are my son - the son that I prayed for and loved while you were here on earth.  I know that I will long to have you in my arms until the day I see you in heaven.  Until then, I must accept that you are with God in a much better place.   As hard as we tried to keep you to ourselves it looks like God too knew that you were an amazing person even before you were born.

Daddy and I will always love you.  

Hugs and Kisses,


Friday, August 1, 2008

We made it to August

No surprises this week. Will got another perfect 10 - he is quite the over achiever. Sadly, I was not able to see his luscious little lips this week but I got some great action shots of his beautiful little baby feet. I have been feeling those little feet for months now but during the Ultrasound we got the best view. Nothing much is cuter than baby feet :-)

This week has been pretty uneventful. Matt and I got some great belly photos which we will upload.... It is pretty amazing how much less modest I have become with my body now that it has a greater purpose. When I first got pregnant I wanted to only have clothes that hung loosely on my belly so that no one could see. Now I find I love my belly. I love to rub it and to look at it in the mirror. I know it seems odd because it is my body but it is quite surreal that I actually have a little baby boy inside.

Highlights from this week also included getting a very special letter from one of our Host Family's daughter. Can you believe that while away at camp this precious little teenage girl took the time to write Matt and I??

She not only wished us and (especially) baby Will well, but she also shared some of the fun she is having at camp. I just started to joyfully cry when Matt brought me the letter.  Last night, the Host mom invited Matt and I to join her and a friend for an evening of girl talk. Matt lasted for about an hour and then went back to work (finishing up some stuff before he unplugs for the birth) but the three of us were up late into the night.  It was so much fun. It has been a while since I was able to have quality time with my girlfriends and so this was really special. 

I also receive a lot of parenting/wife advice. With all of the abnormal things we are dealing with last night felt extremely normal. It is so wonderful to be accepted by this family in such a genuine way. I still think they are angels on earth and I really look forward to the relationship that we will maintain with our host family when we return to Atlanta. I also look forward to see how many ways Matt and I are changed by knowing them and being cared for by them.

Matt and I will never really will be ready for our little one to arrive. We both have our hesitations but I must share that we know we are getting closer. Everyday we talk about all of the wonderful things we are looking forward to enjoying as parents. I have been dreaming and day dreaming about baby Will on a regular basis and really psyching myself up for the battle ahead. I know baby Will is ready. He has shown so much growth, strength,  and determination over the past few weeks here in Philly that it is evident he is up for the challenge.

With all of that said, the doctors are still not making any predictions regarding Will's arrival. They plan to check my cervix on Monday and then we should know if my body is actually getting ready for delivery. I think if we are far enough along they will give us an induction date. Then it will be up to Will to come on his time frame or wait on the induction.

As always, we love you and thank you all for supporting us along the way.    Please keep your thoughts and prayers coming.


Kenny and Jennifer Miller said...

Glad you got some quality "girl time". You definitely need some normal when you can get it on this wild CDH ride. Hang in there, he's almost here!

Jen Miller
Mommy to Sofia

Elizabeth said...

Oh Will is already an overachiever! ;-)

That is a good thing!

From what I understand about CHOP they don't make predictions - but there are a whole lot of CHOP CDH survivors - so keep that in your mind and Will will be one amoung those.

Enjoy the girl time - as a Mom with a husband and a son - ah - can I tell you some stories!

With thoughts, prayers and LUNG FUCTION Chants,

kmm0305 said...

Best of luck to you!! Our baby was born 3 years ago on Aug 11th with an undiagnosed R-CDH. We are in full party planning mode right now, lol! :) We will be thinking of you and Baby Will as he gets ready to make his arrival.

Kristyn Mostek