Mommy's Letter to William Ethan Morgan

My dear sweet baby Will,

I loved you before you were even conceived.  I will never forget the moment I knew you were growing in my belly.  I was singing and dancing and could not wait to share the news.  I thanked God for you every day and focused on loving every moment that we had to share.  My heart grew over the past 10 months to allow me to experience a love that I never knew possible.  Each day my love for God grew because of the miracle he allowed us to share.  I had more love for your father who cared for the two of us with more dedication and concern than I had ever seen.  I had more love for you who brought more joy into my life than I ever knew possible.  Yes the past 10 months have been the best 10 months of my life.

I know that you are with God today.  I may not understand his plan but I do know that if he needed someone full of love he choose the right boy to help him.  Your daddy and I love you so dearly but that is just the beginning.  You have grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, and even perfect strangers who have been moved by your journey.  You, my sweet precious William, have in your short little life been loved more than many who have very long lives.  You have inspired so many of us to be better people and to make the most of the lives and our physical health that we sometimes take for granted.   We are so very proud of you.

I am your mommy and you are my son - the son that I prayed for and loved while you were here on earth.  I know that I will long to have you in my arms until the day I see you in heaven.  Until then, I must accept that you are with God in a much better place.   As hard as we tried to keep you to ourselves it looks like God too knew that you were an amazing person even before you were born.

Daddy and I will always love you.  

Hugs and Kisses,

Mommy

Monday, August 11, 2008

The Final Countdown

Today's appointment went well. Perhaps because we are so close to my due date (8-17-08), we met with the OB today. He completed both the Ultrasound and Non Stress Test. Will received another 10 but there was no sign of impending labor. I ask when we would stop waiting and intervene (thinking induction) and I was told that we will be waiting until next Monday. If Will does not decide to come on his own before Monday then they may determine to move forward with a C-section. This is not my preference but the doctors believe that if Will continues to grow at his current pace and does not naturally move into labor then we should proceed with a C-section.

Although a C-section is not my preference, I want to do the best thing for Will no matter what. I know that the Doctors are the professionals here so I try to keep my opinions to myself. That is not easy for someone at 39 weeks. I am so emotional. I thought by now my body would be accustom to the hormones but I seem more sensitive and moody now than ever. Poor Matt!!! I really am blessed to be married to someone who can love me even when I am crazy.

I have not been 100% the last couple of days. I have a yucky feeling in my tummy and I am a bit dizzy. One of the mid wives told me that she has know that yucky feeling to be a sign of impending labor. I hope she is right. I was beginning to think I was coming down with a cold or stomach bug. Natural labor would be great. This may just be wishful thinking but I am OK with that.

I have mentioned that Matt's parents are here awaiting baby Will's arrival with us. It is really overwhelming that they are here to support us through this experience. Now all we need is baby Will. I am not rushing him but I must admit I am ready for him to come at a moments notice.

Matt packed our overnight bag this morning. I got my maternity leave form completed by the hospital. I still have a few things to do for work but nothing that my team could not manage without me. Matt is trying to wrap up his work too but it is tough. Tomorrow he is planning to sign a lease for office space within 2 miles of the hospital. That should help him balance work and daddy duty most efficiently. He is going to be the best daddy. Will is one fortunate little boy.

We will let you all know as soon as we get any new information. For now we ask that you continue to pray for us and especially Will.

6 comments:

Amy AKA "Baba" said...

That yucky feeling is a great sign. I remember it very clearly with #1 and #2, not as much with Liviana but I had alot of prodromal labor with her.

You still have time...the average gestation for a first time mom is 41 weeks 2 days. I know though being at 39 weeks it seems like an eternity to wait one more day.

He'll be here before you know it. I'll keep checking in.
Amy- Liviana's Mom :).

Anonymous said...

You are in our thoughts and prayers as the final days come to an end. We are a CDH family too. Our little girl, Parker Reese, was born May 7, 2006. You can read her story at www.parkersingletary.com if you'd like.

I just found your blog and am going to play catch up.

Please do not hesitate to contact us if you or your family needs anything.

Jessica

Paula said...

Another CDH mom sending your family prayers and good thoughts. My CDH son was born in November 2007. I really hope Will decides to make an appearance soon and you are able to deliver naturally.

If you do have to resort to a C-Section my advice from experience is to rest as much as possible after his birth and follow the doctor's orders and you'll be able to join your son in no time.

From reading your blog it sounds like Will has been getting big and strong in preparation for the fight ahead.

Take care...your world is about to change...couplehood to parenthood...a scary, but wonderful change.

Brian and Cassi Reed said...

I have been having that same "yucky feeling" since Sunday afternoon, and this afternoon decided to clean out my husbands dresser-pretty sure I am going crazy. Would be pretty fun if we both went on Monday (my induction date). Good Luck will be thinking about you often

Cassi Reed

Lynda said...

Heather,

I just wanted to let you know I'm praying for you, little Will, and your family. Hang in there and good luck. Lynda from Nashville

Elizabeth said...

Heather,

Been thinking of you all and keeping you all in my thoughts, prayers and LUNG FUNCTION chants. Another piece of advise about c-sections - have them start managing your pain before you come out of the spinal and get a bag of ice to put on the incission!

Elizabeth